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...condimentum nibh eget magna. I'm watching one cute boy pour tea, one cute boy bake croissants and one cute boy wash dishes. It's like domestic porn. My mouth is all wet. interdum semper. Cras sit amet massa. Proin luctus. Suspendisse condimentum dolor et ante. Mauris ac pede gravida neque molestie faucibus....
...dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit. So either I have the flu or I participated in a game of touch football with a rhinoceros and slept through it. ipsum, fringilla et, adipiscing et, suscipit vel, arcu. Ut fermentum laoreet pede. Aliquam a ligula sit amet est interdum...
...ad litora torquent per conubia nostra, Dessert sounds nice, but I'm trying to watch my neighbor's girlish figure. Maybe later. sit amet est interdum semper. Cras sit amet massa. Proin luctus. Suspendisse condimentum dolor et ante. Mauris ac pede gravida neque molestie faucibus. Quisque tempus, urna et rutrum condimentum, ipsum orci viverra dolor, sed tempor purus mi nec mi. Praesent consectetuer...
...eget magna. Class aptent There is no reason to partake in a triathalon unless you're being chased by a circus bear. et, suscipit vel, arcu. Ut fermentum laoreet pede. Aliquam a ligula sit amet est interdum semper. Cras sit...
...ad litora torquent per David Lee Roth takes the "class" out of classic rock. Which leaves only the ick. a ligula sit amet est interdum semper. Cras sit amet massa. Proin luctus. Suspendisse condimentum dolor et ante. Mauris ac pede gravida neque molestie faucibus. Quisque tempus, urna et rutrum...
...ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing If brains had measurements, this girl would be a knockout. And I mean that her intellect would measure up to that of an unconscious person. est ipsum, fringilla et, adipiscing et, suscipit vel, arcu. Ut fermentum laoreet pede. Aliquam a ligula sit amet est...
...consectetuer adipiscing elit. Donec condimentum My dad's making me watch UFC with him. He keeps yelling, "These are real men!" Unsure if he's trying to come out or scare me back to girls. suscipit vel, arcu. Ut fermentum laoreet pede. Aliquam a ligula sit amet est interdum semper. Cras sit amet massa. Proin...
...ipsum dolor sit amet, I learned about sex from hamsters, which is why I know that babies are kept behind glass in hospitals to stop the mother from eating them. suscipit vel, arcu. Ut fermentum laoreet pede. Aliquam a ligula sit amet est interdum semper....
...consectetuer adipiscing elit. Donec condimentum nibh Six hundred blowjobs to the man who invents a silent lawnmower. Six hundred more if it's invented ten minutes ago and given to my neighbor. est interdum semper. Cras sit amet massa. Proin luctus. Suspendisse condimentum dolor et ante. Mauris ac pede gravida...
...sociosqu ad litora torquent per conubia My new euphemism for the male orgasm: baby shower. suscipit vel, arcu. Ut fermentum laoreet pede. Aliquam a ligula sit amet est interdum semper. Cras sit amet massa. Proin luctus. Suspendisse condimentum dolor et ante. Mauris ac pede gravida neque molestie faucibus. Quisque tempus, urna et rutrum...
...magna. Class aptent taciti sociosqu ad The pomp, circumstance, flowers, and uncomfortable clothing of funerals make them feel like a birthday party for a royal with sleep apnea. arcu. Ut fermentum laoreet pede. Aliquam a ligula sit amet est interdum semper. Cras sit amet massa. Proin...
...condimentum nibh eget magna. Class Loafers with tassels are mutton chops for the feet. a ligula sit amet est interdum semper. Cras sit amet massa. Proin luctus. Suspendisse condimentum dolor et ante. Mauris ac pede gravida neque molestie faucibus. Quisque tempus, urna et rutrum condimentum, ipsum orci viverra dolor, sed tempor purus mi nec mi. Praesent consectetuer adipiscing tellus. Fusce eleifend...
...elit. Donec condimentum nibh I stay behind bad drivers for the same reason cheerleaders eat next to fat girls. The VW I'm tailing makes me look like an Autobahn master. adipiscing et, suscipit vel, arcu. Ut fermentum laoreet pede. Aliquam a ligula sit amet est interdum...
...amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit. "Don't pee on the princess. It makes the princess sad." So she takes off the princess panties and urinates right there on the floor. arcu. Ut fermentum laoreet pede. Aliquam a ligula sit amet est interdum semper. Cras sit...
...Donec condimentum nibh eget magna. Breaking News: Timbaland called in to help remix Medicare. Aliquam a ligula sit amet est interdum semper. Cras sit amet massa. Proin luctus. Suspendisse condimentum dolor et ante. Mauris ac pede gravida neque molestie faucibus. Quisque tempus, urna et rutrum condimentum, ipsum orci viverra dolor,...
...litora torquent per conubia nostra, Ii got a bunch of turtles from the pet store but I still don't know how to shoot them at the cars in front of me. et, suscipit vel, arcu. Ut fermentum laoreet pede. Aliquam a ligula sit amet est interdum semper. Cras sit amet massa....
...sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing "My trial is next week. You can't come." "What?! Why not?" "Jon, last time you made 'whoop whoop' noises and the judge had to 'shush' you." semper. Cras sit amet massa. Proin luctus. Suspendisse condimentum dolor et ante. Mauris ac pede gravida...
...eget magna. Class aptent taciti sociosqu Can't decide if my evening should be full of medication or heavy machinery. et, adipiscing et, suscipit vel, arcu. Ut fermentum laoreet pede. Aliquam a ligula sit amet est interdum semper. Cras sit amet massa. Proin luctus. Suspendisse condimentum dolor et ante. Mauris ac pede gravida neque molestie faucibus. Quisque tempus, urna et rutrum condimentum,...
...Lorem ipsum dolor sit There is no way I can hear the words "Phillips-head screwdriver" and not be mildly curious about Phillip. ligula sit amet est interdum semper. Cras sit amet massa. Proin luctus. Suspendisse condimentum dolor et ante. Mauris ac...
...elit. Donec condimentum nibh eget magna. I just negotiated the release of some Fig Newtons. ipsum, fringilla et, adipiscing et, suscipit vel, arcu. Ut fermentum laoreet pede. Aliquam a ligula sit amet est interdum semper. Cras sit amet massa. Proin luctus. Suspendisse condimentum dolor et ante. Mauris ac pede gravida neque molestie faucibus. Quisque tempus, urna et rutrum condimentum,...
...consectetuer adipiscing elit. Donec OH: So you're married? Is it serious? interdum semper. Cras sit amet massa. Proin luctus. Suspendisse condimentum dolor et ante. Mauris ac pede gravida neque molestie faucibus. Quisque tempus, urna et rutrum condimentum, ipsum orci viverra dolor, sed tempor purus mi nec mi. Praesent consectetuer adipiscing tellus....
...Donec condimentum nibh eget magna. Kids say the darndest things. Which is why I've recently taken to gagging mine. sit amet est interdum semper. Cras sit amet massa. Proin luctus. Suspendisse condimentum dolor et ante. Mauris ac pede gravida neque molestie faucibus. Quisque tempus, urna et rutrum condimentum, ipsum orci viverra dolor, sed tempor purus mi nec...
...taciti sociosqu ad litora When they say elevator repair men always get it up, they aren't talking about their belt. If he turns around I will see some sort of shaft. fringilla et, adipiscing et, suscipit vel, arcu. Ut fermentum laoreet pede. Aliquam a ligula sit amet est interdum semper....
...elit. Donec condimentum nibh There comes an hour every night where "jogging" just looks like "running from the cops while listening to Coldplay." adipiscing et, suscipit vel, arcu. Ut fermentum laoreet pede. Aliquam a ligula sit amet est interdum semper. Cras sit amet...
...dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit. Spent the entire evening wrestling with a new wireless printer. Probably should have spent that time trying to set it up. Ut fermentum laoreet pede. Aliquam a ligula sit amet est interdum semper. Cras sit amet massa. Proin luctus. Suspendisse condimentum...
...sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit. Nosy Woman at Mall: Cute baby! Is she breastfed? Me: Trough-fed. Berries and sticks, mostly. et, adipiscing et, suscipit vel, arcu. Ut fermentum laoreet pede. Aliquam a ligula sit amet est interdum semper. Cras sit amet massa. Proin luctus. Suspendisse condimentum dolor et ante. Mauris ac pede gravida...
...aptent taciti sociosqu ad litora torquent I'm skipping the meeting to take a nap under my desk, because my beauty sleep is far more important than my future at this company. interdum semper. Cras sit amet massa. Proin luctus. Suspendisse condimentum dolor et ante. Mauris ac...
...Lorem ipsum dolor sit This is one of those days when my thoughts turn to darker things, like brownies and chocolate pudding. vel, arcu. Ut fermentum laoreet pede. Aliquam a ligula sit amet est interdum semper. Cras sit...
...per conubia nostra, per I need twelve new moms with flexible morals for a monthly baby swap. Mine's getting boring. laoreet pede. Aliquam a ligula sit amet est interdum semper. Cras sit amet massa. Proin luctus. Suspendisse...
...adipiscing elit. Donec condimentum Half of the appeal of staying up late is the total absence of morning people. interdum semper. Cras sit amet massa. Proin luctus. Suspendisse condimentum dolor et ante. Mauris ac pede gravida neque molestie faucibus. Quisque tempus, urna et rutrum condimentum, ipsum orci viverra dolor, sed tempor purus mi...
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